Tuesday, October 19, 2010

"Yes", "Not Yet" and "I've Got Something Better"

So I haven't been updating my spiritual journey as often as I perhaps should, but in light of the past two weeks, I needed to update the blog.  Here I am on September 13th, very grateful and life is good, but one month ago, I didn't anticipate how I would get here.  God had his infinite plan in store for our family.  I chose the title for this blog since I believe God answers ALL prayer.  Yes you heard me, ALL prayer.  And I believe he answers them in one of three ways, "Yes", "Not yet" or "I've got something better".  We got all three answers in the last four weeks.

I am so blessed that God entrusted me with four of His children to raise, love, nurture, discipline and teach.  My oldest is a twelve-year old boy, and like most parents do,  I think the world of him.  Yes, he is twelve, about to be a teenager (in a matter of weeks now), and has his moments, but so did I when I was a teenager.  I got to be there when he made his decision for Christ last summer.  I've made all but one (swine flu) of his football games over the past three seasons, and now I'm getting involved with his Middle School Boys Bible Study on Wednesdays.  So I'm quite close to him. 

On the morning of Saturday, August 21 he mentioned to me that he had coughed up some blood that morning.  My mind instantly was saying "RED ALERT! TIME OUT!  WHAT???!!!".  But as calmly as I could, I asked, "How long has this been going on?"  "About a week," was his response.  Now I'm an emotional guy, so I would normally have been a bit overactive to that response.  See my first thoughts were "coughing up blood -> he's a football player -> Ernie Davis -> The Express -> Leukemia".  Twelve year-old boys who are in great health just don't do that.  Well, again, I surprised myself with my response.  ", that is not normal.  You need to tell your mother and I if that ever happens again.  okay?".  To which he agreed.  His mother and discussed and decided that it since it only happened in the mornings, it may have been drainage since he had some congestion a week earlier and he does get bloody noses from time to time.  We said if it happens again, we'd take him to the doctor.  Sounded like the reasonable thing a reasonable loving parent would do, right? I still had a bad feeling in my gut about this, it just didn't feel right.  So we prayed that he would be okay, God said "Not yet."

Mind you during this time, his complexion is getting paler and paler (something we did not notice living with him) but his best friend joked about how pale he was one Wednesday night at practice.  Archive that thought for later in the story.

So the weekend passes and he doesn't cough.  Monday he has football practice and for the first time ever, he throws up on the field.  My beautiful bride notices that he feels like he might have a low-grade fever, so we agree to take him to his pediatrician on Tuesday.  Remember, this entire time we are praying for healing for him, but it was more praying like "Help him not have the flu, or feel better from a cold" type prayer.  Looking back, I see God used this opportunity to challenge our praying by saying "I've got something better" in store. 

Our son goes to the doctor and a diagnosis was given, pneumonia and anemia.  His pale skin was evidence of being anemic and the doctor heard fluid in his lungs so pneumonia.  He was given antibiotics to take and they drew some blood to check his hemoglobin and just to make sure nothing else was wrong.  It still didn't make sense, the pneumonia part, because he didn't cough throughout the day.  Something wasn't adding up, so we prayed for answers, "Not Yet" is what we got.  I distinctly remember working out with a friend at work that day, August 24th.  I told him the story and said, "I'm just worried the blood work could come back bad - like cancer or something".  He said, "And what if it does".  I said, "I don't know".  I don't remember his exact words, but it was something along the lines of, "God will be there for you no matter what".     Fast-forward to Wednesday....

Its lunchtime, Wednesday, August 25th.  I am getting ready to have a lunch meeting with 6 other men from work.  We are having our final meeting concluding our book study Every Man's Battle which is a phenomenal and challenging book to do with a group of Christian men.  The phone rings, its my wife.  My heart sinks.  I know why she's calling.  The blood work came back.

Me: Hello
Wife: (crying on the other end) We have to take (son's name) to the emergency room. (I'm numb now)
Me: Ok, I'll leave right away
Wife: The doctor said its not an emergency but to go as soon as possible. 

She said something else after that, but I didn't hear it.  I hung up and went back into the room and told the guys that we had to take my son to the hospital for further tests.  At this point we hadn't ruled out anything, including cancer.  I was scared.  I was raw.  But the guys rallied around me.  They laid hands on me and prayed for us and our son.  I thanked them and walked to my car.   I dont' remember stepping much during that walk, but I do distinctly remember saying one thing out loud in the parking lot.  "Satan, you will NOT take my son, in the name of Jesus!"  I've never done anything like that before.  I wanted to make a stance and make it clear to the enemy that "As for me and my household, we will serve the LORD" (Joshua 24:15).  I drove to the hospital that afternoon and spoke with my mother who is a Nurse Practitioner along the way.  We decided on the way that worse case, this is leukemia or cancer and best case it is iron deficiency anemia. I also made a few other calls to those closest to me to get the prayer circles fired up.  

"Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven." -Matthew 18:19


I got to the ER and my wife and son were waiting.  We got to be admitted immediately since our doctor called ahead.  He got chest X-Rays and more blood work and we went home.  Again, prayer, again "Not Yet" the answer.  We waited for what seemed like hours, then the house phone rang, it was the pediatrician.


Doc: "It appears he has pneumonia and severe anemia.  We have definitely ruled out cancer and leukemia."  Right then I sent up a huge "PRAISE GOD!!"   We got a "Yes" answer to prayer about it not being the worst case scenario.  However things still didn't make complete sense, not even to the doctor.  She had been on the phone with a colleague from Scottish Rite who also agreed with her diagnosis, based upon the information given.  So we continued with iron supplements, rest and the antibiotics.


For the next few days we kept an eye on him which wasn't a very hard thing to do since he just slept a lot, laid on the couch and got caught up on all the movies and TV Shows he had been missing due to football, school, church and golf.  On Saturday, August 28th,  our boys (we have three of them) started football.  Of course #47 (our oldest) was not playing for his team on that given day, but his doctor did say that he could go to the games and sit and watch if he were feeling like it.  He made it through #6's (my youngest son) game at 9 am just fine, but when we got to #53's (my middle son) game, within 15 minutes of sitting down, he looked very pale and told us "I want to go home."  This really alarmed us.  Twelve year-old boys don't normally ask to go home unless something is seriously wrong, oh and I forgot to mention that he had completed his antibiotics early Saturday morning.  And also early Saturday morning he coughed up blood and both mom and I got to see it.  So my angelic mother-in-law (who has been critical in helping us - we couldn't have gone through this without her) took our sick son home, and we followed quickly behind once #53's game was over.

My wife called the pediatrician and she instructed us to take our oldest son to Children's Healthcare of Atlanta (CHOA) for a possible blood transfusion, that his weakness and other symptoms were because he was not responding to the Iron supplements. 
Real quick here, another great blessing of God doing for us what we cannot do for ourselves, being near the city of Atlanta, our family is blessed to have access to world class children's healthcare.  Praise God for that!
My son at Children's Healthcare of Atlanta - Emory.  He was there five days and got the greatest care anyone could ask for.  Notice how white his skin tone is.
We got to CHOA (formerly Egleston) at Emory Saturday afternoon and that began my son's journey.  We were quickly taken back after going through triage and he was given an IV very quickly and subsequently given fluids.  My son had more chest X-Rays done, more blood work drawn, internal and external exams administered (including one where he asked me, "Daddy, have you ever been through this?" to which I had to say, "No, buddy, I'm sorry you have to").  He was then admitted later that evening and was transferred under the care of the Hematologist, which meant he was located on the AFLAC Cancer Center floor at CHOA.  At this point, no one had a clue what was going on, but they did start to believe what they initially saw as fluid in his lungs was not normal fluid associated with pneumonia, but perhaps blood.  Especially with him coughing up blood. This lead us down more scary paths.  He could have some type of autoimmune disorder like lupus or Wegener's or goodpastures disease.  He may have some sort of vasculitis or some other cardio-pulmonary disorder.  Whew!  I was stressed at this point.  I called my mom on the way home and she asked how I was doing after we discussed my son's condition.  I mentioned to her that I was most stressed about not knowing.  I remember saying, "If we can just name it, then we can treat it."  However, God answered that prayer "I've got something better". The prayers were going up for him big time now, as we received calls, texts, facebook messages, e-mails and other notifications. 


Before I left the hospital, my son's wonderful football team (of which he has been a part of for 3 years now) found out about his condition.  My son normally leads his team in prayer right before they take the field for the game.  We found our through our wonderful neighbor that his best friend did the honor of praying this game and they all wore the number 47 (see picture) on their arms in honor of our son....my wife was crying, I was tearing up, it was very touching.  I do believe God was using him to teach something about the power and prayer and faith to his team as well.  How awesome He is!  God uses situations in our lives that we would never choose to be a part of or want to go through for His glory and for His gain.   But then when we come out on the other side, we realize, "Oh, that's what you meant, God!"  This is one of those situations.  Although we couldn't always see that as we were going through it.

By the way, his team won 32-0.

Hospital, Day 2: Sunday, August 29th:
I spent the night at home, my wife at the hospital.  I woke up many times during the night much like when I travel and feel out of sorts.  Later on Sunday morning, my mother-in-law stayed with the kids and I headed to the hospital  so that I could bring lunch to my wife and son.  Sunday, we had our first visitors: My son's godfather (my wife's uncle) and a very close family friend that is also my son's godmother.  She had another close friend with a child at CHOA and was floating back and forth all week long.  Before I got there, several specialists came in to see him that day and at one point, they thought they may discharge him that afternoon/evening.  While that was certainly an answer to a specific prayer (help him come home soon), in retrospect, it would not have been a good thing if they had.  Fortunately, the pulmanologist and rheumatologist both wanted to do some further testing (including a bronchscopy - where they insert a camera down the lungs in order to take pictures).

Before I got there, my wife informed me that our son had been transferred to the AFLAC Cancer Center.  Well, when I got off the elevator, it was BAM! right there  - the AFLAC Cancer Center. It struck me significantly, thinking "WOW, I'm really in the place I've heard about that treats children for cancer."  Now I'll tell you that the place is wonderful with a great environment for the very sick children for which they provide care.  There are video games, music rooms, many activity places to help kids feel a bit more normal, or as one of the staff informed me, "a home away from home".

Later that day we got some "NOT YET" answers to prayer.  We hoped to be going home that day, but after a visit with the Pulmonologist and Hematologist we got some news, my son needed a Bronchoscopy, which would take place Monday morning as well as a likely transfusion, but that transfusion would not take place until all testing had been completed.  So now we are looking at a prolonged stay at this hospital.  No quick return home here.

After that news, Sunday became a slow day.  We saw a few doctors, nurses and techs.  We also had many tests run and vitals taken.  But being a weekend, it was just enough work to keep my son from getting needed rest, but not enough for significant results to be seen.  We did have several visitors on Sunday.  A few friends of my son's visited him in the hospital later that afternoon.  It certainly brought a smile to my sons' face.  It would be the first of many friends to pay him a visit throughout the week.

Through the wonders of social networking, text messages, and phone calls, word got around to all of our core circles of friends and family that we were spending significant time in the hospital with our sick oldest son.  By that evening, a meal list had been created, prayer lists were being ammended and many reached out personally to see what they could do to help.  I believe that is one prayer that is always answered "YES", our cry out to God for help.  Sometimes our hearts and minds aren't open to how He answers that prayer, but I can tell you from my experience that He always does answer that prayer.  This time, I didn't expect to get the outpouring of love that we received.  It started Sunday and continues to this day.

Later that evening, I left my wife and son at the hospital and drove the hour back to my house.  Fortunately my second son was at a friends' house all day and my mother-in-law was with our two youngest children.  I was thinking we are truly blessed during this time!

Hospital, Day 3: Monday, August 30th
I informed my boss that I would be missing significant time at work this week (and thanks be to God for a very supportive company) and headed to the hopsital once my mother-in-law came over that morning so I could be there in time for my son's procedure.  The procedure was supposed to start at 8 AM, but as with everything in the hospital world, it operates on hospital time.  Which was fine for everyone except my son who was fasting for this procedure.  Early that morning, during my drive in to fight traffic, I heard that it may be mid afternoon before they get a chance to do the scope.  But that changed again when I got there.  OUr time was targeted for 10:30.  It turned out to be perfect as a couple very close to us paid us a visit that morning and would stay until the procedure was over.  We also got a phone call from my sons' youth minister and he prayed over the phone for my son.  WOW.  Then he would show up right before the procedure and pray over him one more time.  My mom and our friends and my sons' godmother were all in the room to see God's awesome work during this time.

The bottom of the 10th hour came and my son was wheeled down to surgery for his bronchoscopy.  It was definitely the longest, yet shortest hour of the entire stay - if that makes any sense.  Clearly our prayers at this point were, "God please let this go well and please let the doctors find what they need to find and please let our son recovery quickly."  Once your child goes into anesthesia, it is very nerve-wracking.  Knowing that he is out for the count and having never been under anesthesia, one never knows how things will turn out.  Thus it was the longest hour of the hospital stay for me.  But the time went by quickly since family and friends were near by in the waiting room to help pass the time by.  The doctor came out about quarter to twelve and showed us pictures of our sons' lungs.  He said that it went very well and that our son was recovering nicely.  God answered a big YES at this point.  The bronch confirmed suspicions of blood in our sons' lungs but still no conclusions at this point.

Once they had our son back in his room they began the process of ordering his blood transfusion.  I volunteered my blood since we were a match, but the doctors said that it would take longer to process mine and thus delay my son's recovery.  So I donated at the mobile unit outside - you know, to pay it forward.

When I got back, my son got some very special visitors.  His head football coach and one of the assistant coaches, his best friend and mother, the team mom from the football team and her son (who plays qb).  It definitely cheered my son up.  During their stay (his football coach stayed for an hour and a half) they got to see the blood transfusion start as well as an ultra sound on his heart.  those were the last tests before some conclusions were beginning to be made.  But the visitors were the highlight of the day.  It speaks volumes about the coaches that they would drive the 45 minutes from our area down to Atlanta and spend that time with one of their players.  It was music to Coach's ears when he heard my son would begin IV Steroid treatment on Tuesday and that would cause him to gain some weight over the next few weeks.  My son plays center and at 12 years old, he is 5' 4" and 118 lbs as of his hospital visit.  He needed to gain some weight.

We got some more news that day, the Rheumatologist ruled out any arthritis, lupus or vasculitis.  A big "YES" answer from God on our prayers. We were still awaiting the Wegener's test to come back, and that wouldn't be until Wednesday.  That night we were able to get my son some pizza as he requested and my wife stayed with him again that night.  The next day we would bring his brothers and sister down to see him - they were getting very concerned at home.

Hospital, Day 4: Tuesday, August 31st
My son started Tuesday with his first round of IV Steroids (to stop the bleeding in his lungs).  He said it made a weird taste in his mouth.  This particular day was uneventful other than the steroids.  I brought his brothers and sisters to see him and brought lunch.
It was great for the entire family to have a visit with our sick boy on Tuesday

Tuesday was to be my night to stay with him at the hospital, and I was looking forward to that.  I brought the game CLUE and we got him a few movies from the Library.  We also were transfered to the Cardiac step-down unit as my son was no longer under the care of the hematologist but of the chief physician at CHOA.

Hospital, Day 5: Wednesday, September 1st
Rough day with the IV Steroids - my son's IV popped out and he had some severe swelling and pain that morning.  Ugh! My heart broke for him, though!  He had to get ANOTHER IV in order to get Thursday's medicine, but at least he was IV free for about a day.

Wednesday was BIG PRAISE day!  God answered another prayer "YES" .  The Wegener's test was negative.  PRAISE GOD!  but that meant that Davis would likely be discharged undiagnosed (idiopathic).  So God (and even to this date) has  "NOT YET" given us an answer to his condition.

He also received another friend visitation on Wednesday evening.  Bless their hearts, though, they drove to the wrong CHOA campus and had to drive another 20 miles just to come see my son!


Hospital, Day 6: Thursday, September 2nd
Big Praise, our son is going home!!!  a big YES answer from our Lord and God!  While we did not yet have a final diagnosis, he was doing so much better after a third day of steroids and his transfusion.  He would be scheduled to have follow-ups but he no longer had to wear a hospital gown and IV.  He was going to go home and rest and recover.  PRAISE GOD!!


Our son on his miraculous exit

First, I want to thank GOD for answering many of our prayers "YES", some "NOT YET" and others "I've Got Something Better".  I give HIM all the credit for the miracle of the first week of September.  We thank everyone for ALL their prayers and support and LOVE.   Just like the Matt Maher song goes, 

It don't have a job
Don't pay your bills
Won't buy you a home
In Beverly Hills

Won't fix your life
In five easy steps
Ain't the law of the land
Or the government

But its all you need

Love will hold us together
Make us a shelter
to weather the storm

And I'll, be, my brothers keeper
So the whole world will know
That we're not alone

It's waiting for you
Knockin' at your door
In the  moment of truth
When your heart hits the floor

When you're on your knees and

Love will hold us together
Make us a shelter
to weather the storm

And I'll be my brothers keeper
So the whole world will know
That we're not alone

This is the first day of the rest of your life
This is the first day of the rest of your life
'Cause even in the dark you can still see the light
It's gonna be alright s'gonna be alright

This is the first day of the rest of your life
This is the first day of the rest of your life
'Cause even in the dark you can still see the light
It's gonna be alright s'gonna be alright

Love will hold us together
Make us a shelter
to weather the storm

And I'll be my brothers keeper
So the whole world will know
That we're not alone


Love definitely kept our family together and close to God.  Thank you to all of you!  Praise be to the King of Kings!  Jesus is the reason for our miracle!!